Saturday, June 25

Ynomrah Studios | Madrid, IA

LOCATION: Beautiful, beautiful, green Iowa. I couldn't find a weekend class in Ames, but did find one in Madrid (pronounced mædrɪd... think someone from Boston saying Madrid, with the accent on meh...). It was a half hour drive of nothing but gorgeous farmland until I came upon this town of 2500-ish. Free street parking. 
COST: Drop-in fee was $8 (they have a nice little yogi shop in there, so I imagine they take cards... I paid in cash, so I'm not sure).
STUDIO: The front entrance (or the side the address puts you at) is not the entrance, but there is easy signage taking you around the corner to the door you enter through. It's an old building—think exposed brick, high ceilings, old hardwood floors... I love old buildings. They updated it nicely with paint, hanging lights, and curtains. The actual yoga space is a nice size... could easily fit a class of 20, but we had four today. 
CLASS DESCRIPTION: Yoga 1 For all levels A REQUIREMENT FOR BEGINNERS. This vinyasa style class is a perfect place to discover your strength, flexibility, alignment and form. Learn basic breathing techniques & hatha postures that will help you de-stress and build core strength.
INSTRUCTOR: Lisa I couldn't find a bio for her... sorry.
CONTACT: Ynomrah Studios 

I. Am. Mortified. Back story? Ok... we had a rehearsal wedding/dinner to attend last night, and they were kind enough to make me a special vegetarian meal (I don't eat meat or dairy). When they brought me a plate of cheese stuffed raviolis covered in cheese & mushrooms... I thought, uh oh. But I'm not completely strict with my dairy and know that when we travel I may not be able to have food my way. So, I politely ate half my meal. It was really good. Then when dessert was cheese cake,  I figured I'd done the damage already, why not? This... this is why not. 

I should give you the heads up, people who are trying yoga for the first time, it is VERY common for you to show up 15 minutes before a class starts and no one to be there... the yoga studio locked, no one in sight. Sit tight, my friends, two or three students will show up and then the instructor. It's so easy to set up the yoga studio for class (turn on lights, lay out mat, done!) that it's normal for class to start two minutes after the doors are unlocked (unless you are going to hot yoga/bikram... they usually recommend you show up a half hour early to adjust to the temperature). 

When I entered the studio Lisa asked me if I had any yoga experience. Yep. And then we went into the room to get ready... waiting a few minutes in case anyone else showed up, the ladies chatted about a new place in Madrid (I forgot the name, sorry), where the food is supplied by The Radish out of Grimes. They all love the food there, so we may have to go this weekend. If not, when we return.

Then Lisa had us get started. She moved things along a little bit faster than I'm use to, more flow-like (which she confirmed, she does like flow). So it was good to work up the sweat a little quicker... until the sweat was the result of a cheese demon waking in my stomach. With every crunch and twist I slowly started realizing I wasn't going to be able to casually get through this class with out possibly getting sick... what do I do? Do I leave all together? I can't, I haven't paid yet... ok, I'm just going to go to the bathroom mid-class, that isn't unusual... so I started to walk towards the door when Lisa looked up, and I asked "Where is the bathroom?" She pointed back to the inside of the classroom to the small room that I thought was a dressing room... nope, bathroom. I now get to go to the bathroom with an entire yoga class listening on. Seriously?! And now that I've asked where the bathroom is... I can't continue out the front door seeing if there was a bank near by or anything. Ok... just go in there and splash some cold water on your face. Pull it together, Poppen, this is ridiculous. To avoid embarrassing details and ruining your possibly less disgusting view of me... I exercised the cheese demon. I had no choice. I hate myself. Maybe I can just stay in this room until everyone leaves. Maybe there's an escape route, a trap door, a candle stick that I move and the wall rotates me to safety. Nope. Nothing. 

Head down, I went back to the class, joined back in... fearful of everyone knowing my dirty, little secret. I tried to just get back into my practice, because Lisa was really leading a wonderful class. Working our core by holding boat pose longer than I have before, flowing in and out of forward folds. It really was a great starter class for anyone interested in getting to know yoga. Meanwhile, my brain is analyzing every horrible reaction... is that lady coughing because she has a dry throat? or is she gagging? everyone is staring at me, I know it! why is my yoga mat the only mat making farting noises when I go into downward dog. sigh. Where is the silver-lining in this story? If I tell you this story, you have no excuse to not check out a class... because you will never be as horrible as that one time (today) a new girl (me) came into our little class and changed our view of people from Illinois forever (sorry Illinois). 

After class I apologized to Lisa for interrupting the class, probably over-explaining myself as one does when they're embarrassed or self-conscious. If Lisa finds my little card and discovers this review... I'm so sorry your review was shadowed by my cheese demon. I really do recommend everyone else enjoy one of her classes... I, however, may never step foot in Madrid again. 

3 responses:

  1. oh anni... i laugh b/c you are so self-deprecatingly gracious, but am mortified with you, too! next time, bring lactaid?? =D xxxooo

  2. ha ha embarassing. I am glad I am not the only one that puts herself into situations like that. Hope you enjoyed the cheese cake!

  3. Thank you ladies... it's true, SO true. I will never travel with out lactaid again (or leave the house even), and I did so very much enjoy the cheese cake (although I wouldn't say it was worth all of this). *heart*